it's been about two months since we downsized our living space by 2,000ish square feet. we had all the emotions during the seven months it took to buy hillcrest, sell our house, downsize and move.
when we were unpacking everything was great and cute and fun and we felt built for this transition. and then the newness started wearing down a little bit and not everything was great and cute and fun.
don't get me wrong, we aren't changing our minds about the lifestyle we chose. we're still glad we made the decisions we made. we are, however, becoming aware of more things we didn't consider...plus still sitting with some of our original concerns.
let's just say I've been 'at my capacity' two or three times and it wasn't pretty. sorry bob. my frustration came from feeling cramped and claustrophobic...like a big fish in a small pond. I almost threw out every plant I own just to get a little breathing room. luckily we have a lot of outdoor space and a cute patio so moving during the spring/summer was so crucial to making this work.
here's a real life video of our current living conditions. no prep of cleaning up and making things look good before this home tour. this is pretty typical of a Saturday situation where we're doing projects, eating lunch and living a typical life. it's easy to see how the clutter can take over so quickly.
we don't have a lot of counter space, most all the storage space is spoken for, I love stuff, blah, blah, blah. I could go on about all the issues that are bothering us [me ??] but I'll save that for another post because there's a bigger awareness I'm coming to.
when I step back and look at the situation it boils down to making decisions and taking action, or the lack there of. then I realize that this is true in any size home. there's just a much smaller threshold in a home of our size. we can't really walk away from any of the to-do's that need to be done because we can see them from every spot in the house. and there's no shutting doors to hide things because we utilize every space, every day.
this insight paired with our individual sensory preferences has me understanding how much deeper building a home and life of our dreams really is. I'm learning about what topics each of us tends to put off, trying to figure out why and working to find a way to deal with it rather than sweep it under the rug. because we can't handle that lumpy of a rug in this tiny of a space!
which brings me back to the perspective I've been clarifying lately [thanks tad] that our surroundings are a physical representation of our internal landscape. as we pay attention to our surroundings we can start to understand ourselves a little bit more. and then it's up to us to decide if we want to do anything about the things we find.
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